All the way to meet Balaji

A last minute plan to meet the most famous and worshiped deity is not what a normal person would do. But I guess we are crazy that way. We had been putting off going to Tirupati for a long time now and we decided enough was enough. I booked tickets to and from Tirupati for the Saturday. We later came to know how disastrous it was.

My dad had arranged for a room in Ahobila Mutt right behind the temple so as for the stay, there was no problem. But that was the least of the worries. Getting darshan from Lord Srinivasa at Tirupati is more difficult than seeing the Lord Himself in person. Everyone including my cook, said that we may have to wait for 16 hours in Sarva Darshan (free tickets) or 8 hours for Special Darshsan (Rs. 300 per ticket). But the catch was, special darshan has limited tokens and it was full till June. I didn't want to wait till June. My dad told me that it was some special day so it would be next to impossible to get darshan on a Saturday. But we were determined to go anyway. We inquired around, asked everyone in our office who had ever set foot in Tirupati and we boarded the bus fully prepared with two plans and a back up plan, none of which included Sarva Darshan.

We reached Tirupati a little after 5.30 AM and we went straight to Srinivasa Complex behind bus stand, all set to be the first to wait in the queue to get Special Darshan tickets. Limited tickets are sold only in this place for people who don't have access to internet or for crazy people who decide to risk an adventure in the last minute. But the tickets were cancelled for the day! We didn't know what to do. We gave it a thought to climb the last of seven hills and get a Divya Darshan ticket which would take 5 hours wait in the queue but we were not up for it. So we got a Sarva Darshan ticket with a time slot for 8 PM that night and left to board the bus up the seven hills, resorting to the back up plan of returning home without seeing Balaji, because even with the time slot, everyone scared us that it would take at least 5 hours which means we'd have to stand till 1 AM next morning.

Sarva Darshan tickets, 27  April 2019

When we reached our place of stay we came to know that they had no more vacant AC rooms so from there on everything was downhill. I got ready and met my dad's friend in the Mutt who helped us with the room in the last minute. He seemed very positive about us getting Darshan . He easily pointed out that it shouldn't take any later than 12 o clock to get back to the room. That made me feel better. We were cat on the wall, yet to decide whether to go back home or not. Cancelling the return ticket was not an option as we were past the cancellation window. Even the bus operators wanted us to have this darshan. And, according to my husband, going to Tirpati doesn't fulfill my mom's wishes, getting the darshan does. We decided we'd stay back anyway and get darshan because I didn't want to go all the way again for this any sooner. I wish we could get away with the fine print in such wishes.

We had breakfast at Saravana Bhavan near by and we came back to our room and slept the whole day. We missed the lunch at Ahobila Mutt as we slept like a log. Lunch at saravana bhavan turned out to be just ok.

7 PM

We took a share cab and joined the queue. It was fast moving initially until we reached one of the so called compartments where it was moving at a slow pace, but moving. I was a little apprehensive about leaving my footwear and my phone in the room but that was much better than leaving them at the temple entrance and going back all the way to collect them after darshan. Also, the floor was neat so it didn't bother me much. Half way through the waiting we realized that we could have started much earlier and joined the queue so that we'd be done by then and boarded the bus to home. The crowd was moving nevertheless and a little boy at the end would shout "Govinda" which was answered by the devotees roaring "Govinda" back. Whenever we were blocked at the compartments, this was the sign to indicate everyone that the queue started moving again. 

8 PM

There were restrooms everywhere, water bottles and snacks sold by small time vendors, water provided by the temple's administration every nook and corner, fans to keep the devotees from bursting into flames during the hot summer season and the floors neat and tidy for our comforts. At some points the queue would expand and narrow down and I'd feel everyone on me. But this did not seem to bother any other devotee who was hell bent on getting a darshan. Not that if you decided to give up, they'd allow you to go out, no. There is only one way and that is to God. There were small kids to old people who didn't utter one word of complaint to wait in queue of one lakh people. All they wanted was to get a glimpse of the deity.

We were standing in a very confined area just before the darshan at moola sthalam and this was the most suffocating I have been. This included the time I went to Ratha Yatra in Puri and was squeezed in a crowd of 10 Lakh devotees. The place was too narrow and the crowd was too much to take. We stood there for almost an hour, hardly moving. Most people sat down but my heart and my OCD did not permit that. So we waited standing.

8.40 PM

Somehow we thought if we could get darshan by 9.30 we could rush down the hill to board the bus. I know, another crazy thought right? Well, I am like that. I knew my hubby was not on board with this plan but he was a little hopeful up to 9 PM. I was secretly wishing that we make it to the bus. I kept thinking that we should have started at 6 PM and that way we would be done by then and back to Tirupati base, boarding the bus.

9.15 PM

We were closer to the darshan point. How did I know? The crowd became too enthusiastic and we did not have to walk to move forward. The mob did it for us. It felt like we were floating and we couldn't control it. My husband held me tight just so I wouldn't be crushed or get caught in a stampede but at that point, coming that far, all I wanted was to get out of that queue and get some fresh air to breathe. 

9.30 PM

The crowd kept moving at a faster pace. We were much closer to darshan. We could feel it. The energy of the crowd, people chanting "Govinda", volunteers and temple employees rushing us, every kid on top of their father's shoulders, the momentum moving us forward apart from all this, was an experience of a lifetime. And then just for a fleeting moment I saw Lord Srinivasa (or Venkatesha or Balaji as He goes by many names) beautifully adorned in jewels and flowers. You know how you keep thinking you must pray for this or wish for that, when you get darshan? But in reality you just freeze mentally. Physically you are pushed by the volunteers and the crowd but mentally, for that one second you know there is nothing more important than getting a sight full of the Lord. For just that one fleeting moment you want to gulp the deity at the distant and memorize it because you don't know when you will get this opportunity again. While I tried to think of something to wish for (and I did), I was shoved by the volunteer to the next deity in less than a fraction of a second.

We moved faster, we actually ran and reached the laddoo point to receive our prasadam. I started running again but my husband was hopeless and irritable at this point. I did not give up. I ran so fast to the room from the exit of the temple, thank God it was just behind the temple, packed the entire room in less than a minute and checked out. We took a cab which cost us more than the bus tickets (Rs. 800 to go downhill in 45 mins) and I called the bus driver and pleaded him to wait for us. He obliged. The phrase "Thank God" came to my mind. The cab driver stepped on it, honked his way down the seven hills along the beautifully well lit Tirupati city at night. When we reached the boarding point the bus driver smiled at me and said that the same passengers from previous night have boarded his bus and he was waiting for one more person to arrive, for 15 mins. So much for missing the dinner and risking our lives to get there. But hey, one of my wishes got fulfilled.

What a way to spend our anniversary of our first date!

Little things: Road side Bhel puri and raw mango pieces spiced with chilli powder, sold around the temple made my day. 

Tip from the trip: Do not book return tickets when you go to Tirupati. Not everyone gets lucky.